I was talking to my best friend the other day. We spoke specifically about her older sister. Lets call her “Morgan”. She is in a “relationship” with some bottom of the barrel guy that really shouldn’t be called a man. Now, before you judge me for saying that, hear me out.
Now, no man is perfect. The same goes for women but many have qualities that make them worth being with. If you feel like trash because that’s how you are treated, I’m pretty sure the relationship is toxic. And that’s the relationship Morgan happens to be in. She has been treated like complete trash by this guy for over a year now.
To give you some background information, Morgan is almost 30, has three kids, and works for the U.S Military. All her kids are for the same guy the youngest being around 3. Her kids’ father was no good for her but she continuously messed around with him, even when they were officially over. Honestly speaking, Morgan has a lot of self esteem issues and would rather have a man that treats her like crap than be single. She has the belief that she is not worth anything. A woman who works such and important job and brought three beautiful girls into this world feels like NOTHING. It’s unbelievable!
In the beginning of Morgan’s “relationship” with her current guy he told her that she was ugly and physically unattractive. He implied that no one would ever want her. These are thoughts she already had so he just drilled it deeper in. He stayed in her house lived off of her and would be in and out of her home. They planned on buying a house together after a couple of months but when it was becoming a reality this guy started acting funny and finding any reason to fight so he could leave. After supporting herself, kids, and him became to much she started struggling to keep affloat. When she could no longer afford her home she moved back with her mother. He went on to live somewhere else, she wasn’t allowed to know where, and only contacted her for sex. They’d get together at motels that she undoubtedly paid for.
When she found out she was pregnant he became more emotionally abusive towards her. At some point before that, when he wanted to leave her, she got drunk and downed a bunch of sleeping pills. She claimed she didn’t know how many she took and that she wasn’t trying to commit suicide. Mentally, I think she is unstable.
Once she bought her home a few months after she moved into her mom’s place, he all of a sudden wanted to be with her and all the Jazz. Currently, he lives with her rent free. All he does is mow the lawn. God forbid she needed him to watch her girls in the case of an emergency, he wouldn’t do it. This is a man that makes well over $24 a hour. A hour! He doesn’t even put food on the table. Did I mention he beats her up. She’s a scrawny little thing and one good hit could take her out permanently.
What can you say to someone in this situation? I’m a tough love kid of gal. I’d be damed if some guy was putting my sister down and trying to isolate her from her family.
So many women and men go through things like this. It’s heartbreaking and upsetting. I’ve been there myself. You can’t really help someone until they are ready. Whether it’s fear, finances, or “love” that keeps a person in a crappy relationship, until they mentally leave they won’t physically leave. It’s best to continue to support them and listen to them and try not to give up. No matter how difficult it is for you to standby(unless there is physical violence, take action in those cases.) stick around because when the time comes the trust they have in you will be what gets them to reach out when they’re finally ready to leave their partner.
Like always guys, (HUGGS AND LOVE)