The battle between stay at home moms and working moms.

I believe that most mothers know that there’s some type of unspoken war between moms who stay home with their kids all day and moms who, go out and work. You choose what you want to do depending on what’s best for you and your household. We all have our reasons but some women tend to judge the ones on the other side of the fence.

Selfish! You’re selfish if you leave your child in the care of someone else so you can work. You’re selfish if you don’t get a job to help contribute financially to your child’s upbringing. Take it easy ladies! Even though I’m a SAHM I still try to find work-from-home jobs, not because someone told me to but because I want to. I can understand why both sides make their decisions. I myself wanted both. I can’t judge another mother for doing what she felt she needed to do. If her kids are loved and well-taken cared of, that’s all that matters. MYOB! Lol

Besides being seen as the worse mother in the world, you can also be labled as lazy or a work-aholic that doesn’t love your kids. Listen, once again, different strokes for different folks. Wanting to be at home with your kids doesn’t mean you’re trying to run from working and working doesn’t mean you’re trying to run from your kids. I would love to have a job and make lots of MONEY but that’s not my reality. With two girls, child care would cost more than their monthly expenses in just one week; I’d be working to pay someone to take care of my kids because I’m working to pay them. Get it? Some people can afford that and still have money left over and then some to be able to help pay bills. I mean depending on how low or high your income is you can either get assistance or have enough money to pay for whatever without blinking an eye. It’s all about your life and your needs as a mother and family.

I thought that mothers supported and encouraged each other for the most part. Turns out that just like with any other thing, personal decisions on working or staying home can ruffle a lot of feathers. I was once oblivious to the tension such a topic could create. How can you, not knowing someones background, assume anything based on a mother that works or stays home?

I’d like to hear some thoughts on this. And like always, (Hugs and Love!)

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Suicide

I just came off the phone with my cousin. A really good friend of ours was rushed to the emergency room while my cousin followed behind the ambulance. My cousin has no idea what happened to our friend. Our friend, who is such an amazing person, has been through a lot. You would never know, because she hides it well behind a smile, that she is suicidal.

It got me thinking more about the dream I had last night. I dreamt one of my classmates hung herself. I prayed that it was just a dream. As crazy as it sounds, some of my dreams have came true… the bad ones anyway. Not like a dejavu but REALLY coming true, whether in entirety or in part.

Earlier my mother, who works at a school, told me that one of the students tried to commit suicide. He is 11! He wanted to jump off of a ledge and kill himself because he wanted to talk to his brother. I found out that his brother was my former schoolmate. He was shot and killed, in 2015, outside of a night club. Just a year later, this little boy’s other two older brothers were in a car crash that took the life of one of them. Heartbroken and defeated, this child would rather be dead than live with the pain of losing his brothers. It is obvious that he needs to speak to a counselor. I fear he might succeed in killing himself and create yet another tragedy for his family if he doesn’t get help.

The theme of today seemed to be suicide and it’s frightening. I’ve been through some crazy things in my life but I have never thought about killing myself. What causes a person to what to do that? How much pain are they feeling that instead of overcoming it, they rather turn it off for good?

It brings tears to my eyes thinking about it. So many people have these thoughts and now even children have begun to see suicide as their only option. I recall reading that a 7 year-old(SEVEN) killed himself because of bullying. At seven, you’re still a baby! How did he even know about such a thing?

I’ve helped three people not go through with their suicide in the past. The most recent was a couple months ago and the others were in 2009. Once I see posts about “not wanting to live” or being “better off dead” right away I jump into action. I don’t care if I don’t know you; I’ll do everything I can to stop you from taking your life. I wish other people were like that. Some either think it’s not their business or don’t take it seriously. Anyone who talks negatively about life in general and how much they don’t want to live, should be taken serious. It is a matter of life and death. It’s a cry for help.

I hope  those considering killing themselves seak help. I pray that someone gets to them before they end their life. If you have felt this way, I may not know you but, you are AMAZING, UNIQUE, PERFECT. God doesn’t make mistakes. And if you question God and where he is in your pain, know that he is in everyone willing to help you! As always guys (Hugs and Love)! Good night.

I did a two day blog-liking-and-commenting spree.

❤️Happy Valentines Day❤️

I’ve had my blog Entrepreneur Mama Blog and The Short Bit for a few months now. My personal blog has been up longer than my short story blog but both had received next-to-nothing activity for the most part. I barely knew how to navigate the site. Once I learned a little bit and started posting, nothing happened. I half expected my blog to blow up with visitors. I then thought my content just sucked and people were probably seeing my post and ignoring them. I hadn’t realized that I was basically posting an invite to my party on my bedroom wall and expecting people to show up.

I struggled with getting people to my site for months. My short story blog had more activety than my personal blog but it wasn’t anything to brag about. I couldn’t understand how in the world anyone, just starting out, could get attention. Then about two days ago, I decided to interact with my fellow bloggers; something I had NEVER done before.

I searched random topics and began to like and comment on some of the post. Instead of doing this for a handful of post, I read down the list and began reading post like crazy and liking and commenting on ALL! At first it was intimidating, like being the new girl in high school. I wondered if anyone would take the time to reply to me or visit my page. It didn’t take long before my notifications were going crazy and I felt a since of pride. People were grateful for my comments and having mini conversations with me.

This all led some people to visit my site as well. Needless to say, I had gotten more activity in one hour than I had gotten in all the months before, combined. I had to think of my site as a living thing. Just like people, it thrives on interaction! My site was a cave dweller and it needed to get out more and play nice with others in order to become more…likable. Lol! I needed to interact with others. Once I did,it was great; which made me decide to take two days to submerge myself in other people’s content.

The results were great. Luckily, everyone I interacted with was awesome. They were all so sweet and welcoming. I for one, have always dreaded the comment section of sites and social media. You were bond to find an argument or end up in one yourself. You could say the sky was blue and someone would jump on you insisting it wasn’t and you were a fool for thinking such a thing. Thankfully, as I site-hopped, I  came across NONE of that. I found amazing woman and men getting along and cheering each other on. I found inspiration and hope. And I now know, that even if I get lost in my little bubble again, I can reach out to so many of you.

Thank you all for being so great! (Hugs and Love)

My year long journey to self-awareness

via Daily Prompt: Aware

I’ve always thought that I knew myself, knew what I would or wouldn’t put up with. I believed I knew what I could and couldn’t take. I’d imagine myself in certain situations and think I know what I would do. I’ve been put to the test beyond my wildest imagination but nothing has come close to what I’ve dealt with in the past year.

Around this time last year I was nine months pregnant with my 1st biological child. I was already raising my ex’s daughter who I love with all my heart and soul and the new addition was a joy. The problem was my ex boyfriend. He was mean, aggressive, and manipulative. I dreaded almost every waking moment with him. He had some good moments but the bad ones always outweighed them. He made me feel like a burden because I didn’t work so I could take care of our little girl. That’s what he wanted. He said I that I shouldn’t work just take care of the baby(yes BABY) and enjoy my pregnancy. It wasn’t before long until he started saying he was the only one working hard and no one was helping him.

I would constantly be put down and I cried every day, which turned into multiple times a days. He told me to move across the country to his friends home or he would leave me. I flew at 35 weeks 5 days to live with him at his friends place. At this point I had high blood pressure, my daughter was behind in her growth, I was told by my doctor that I needed to stay off my feet, and was admitted twice into the hospital and had to get a shot to stop my contractions at 28 weeks. With all that I still had to take care of a baby by myself. My ex worked two jobs and didn’t do much besides that and because I didn’t support our family I was continuously getting heat for it. He complained that I didn’t cook enough. I didn’t even want to be there, I was getting cursed out every day, and I had to take care of a baby while having a struggling pregnancy…no I didn’t cook much! I wasn’t even supposed to be on my feet alot.

I stayed thinking he would change in the beginning but learned the hard way he wouldn’t. He doesn’t even see anything wrong with his actions still. He says I “Looked for it.” and that I should be happy and was lucky that I was only getting cursed at because other women were being  physically abused. He said I was playing victim and my “battered woman act” was getting old. I still made it my mission that whenever he would go through something bad I’d be there for him knowing he was the reason I felt like crap. He’s consistently done things to spite me and hurt me and I wonder why I took it for so long.

I was aware of what he was doing to me but I was NOT AWARE OF WHAT I WAS DOING TO MYSELF! I was putting myself through hell to keep a family. I was losing my sanity to have someone to share a bed with. I was forcing myself to pretend to be happy, when all I really wanted to do was RUN! I wasn’t aware that I had a part to play in my own misery by staying in such a situation. Believe me it’s hard to leave especially when you have no family or friends near.

When I started to really understand what was happening, I slowly started to back away. I made sure I had proper footing before I took each step. Looking from the outside in at bad relationships you think you know all the answers, then you go through it and have no clue what to do. This last year has changed me. I’ve been through things no one but me and him know. He’s told me things to break me and sometimes, when I didn’t cry, I’d say something to hurt him so he’d understand my pain. It was all a losing battle honestly.

I hope that anyone going through anything like what I did, wakes up and leaves. No man or woman is worth your self-peace. I hesitate, even now, to tell my full story. Talking about it helps me cope and if I tell people the truth it makes it impossible for me to sweep everything under the rug and go back to him. This topic is something I fear to talk about but need to and I hope it speaks to someone out there.

How to get rewards and make money using apps!

Getting straight to the point, I found a site that gives rewards, which includes cash, for downloading apps and using them for at least two minutes. Feature points is a really cool website (it has an app as well) that gives you a chance to claim cool rewards through points you generate by downloading apps. The apps are literally ones you’d get on your own or for your kids. Games, music, and health apps can be found on feature points. A lot of those apps are ones you’d have to pay for but you’re getting for free to basically test. I actually kept some.

This is not, by any means, a get rich quick opportunity ! Lol. So please keep that in mind. I’ve been searching for ways to make extra cash or get great stuff while being a SAHM. Now I’m sharing it with you. It’s free to sign up. Who doesn’t like free stuff, right? I know I love it.

What you have to do is go to http://featu.re/GSTTFE or search for the feature points app. Once you got that, you’ll see a list of apps to download. Each app has a certain amount of points and after you download AND use the app for two minutes you get credited. This can be quite tidiest if you have crappy internet service like me but if you have high speed internet it should be a breeze to knock out. Be aware that some apps go into “pending” meaning for whatever reason once you’ve used it, it shows up as not even being downloaded. You should be able to click it again and get credited, if not move on to another app. Do EVERY single app you can in order to get a lot of points.

The rewards you can get range from paid apps to $1000 cash in your paypal account. The points system can be rather slow in terms of collecting enough to get rewarded big, quickly. If you’re a gamer or have a lot of time on your hands this is for you! I like it because it doesn’t take too much attention and I’m able to use it while my kids are up.

Use my referral code GSTTFE when signing up to get 50 points right away. You can gain points by taking surveys, though I haven’t taken any, or doing other task like liking feature points’ Facebook page or subscribing to their YouTube channel. I got over 200 points in under an hour when I first started and that was on my bogus internet. It’s worth sticking with and you can refer other people and they’ll get 50 points from your code. I wish you guys luck!

I am NOT a paid advertiser, though I wish. Lol. I just really like this website and it’s app.